I have been to the hospital today to discuss the next step in treatment. The test to determine the chance of recurrence in the next 10 yrs has gone to America today and the results will be back in 3 weeks. The oncologist is pretty confident I won't need chemo so will hopefully start radiotherapy in June for 4 1/2 weeks.

The good news is she is allowing me to go to Shrewsbury hospital for treatment which means I can go daily instead of staying in the hospital Mon to Fri each week in Swansea.

 I am nervous about radiotherapy as I know it burns and itches, I suffer from prickly heat in one area of my body and guess what its the breast and cleavage area. Its  so painful when it kicks in and I,m worried this is going to aggravate it  on top of everything else. The good news I had today is the doctor told me I can have liposuction on the damaged breast as its now become dented and misshapen and she says it will get worse after radiotherapy. I did make a comment to my hubby that they could use the fat from my hips and he commented that my boobs would be massive afterwards, cheeky git.

New haircut

Well I finally did it after weeks off thinking about it, and I really like it. I know its a bit drastic but its just what I wanted. Life is to short  (just like my hair) and my way of thinking is its only hair and it will grow back. So if I don't end up having the chemo I shall put some funky colours through it.

I,ve had a lovely relaxing time away, saw lots of friends and really chilled out. Went to some lovely towns and villages in the Cotswold's and had a great day out in Bath with Jo and Olivia. Didn't actually get to shop much in Bath as Olivia who is 3 is not into shopping (I,m sure this will change as she gets older) but I could see some lovely shops and will defiantly visit again. 

Did buy some treats from Cath Kidston and a new coffee machine as ours broke. I have to say its impressive it makes frothy Lattes in under a minute our last one had to be warmed up for 15 minutes before attempting to make one. I got some vintage egg cups on ebay I thought they would be cool in the caravan.

 I also recently bought this vintage bread bin of ebay, it was in a state when it arrived looked like it had been stored in a barn, its scrubbed and clean again now.

Have been tidying Polly Dolly for next week, checking what I need to stock in the cupboards, had to get my priorities right and make sure all the alcoholic ingredients are there for the cocktails. I think all we need to do now is refill the gas and she's ready to go. The weather has been so good it better not change next week. 

Have decided not to return to work until treatment has finished and I,m fully recovered, I will do the admin and paperwork and take in some laundry to help out but I won't be out  cleaning, this way  I can do everything at my pace and I won't be letting anyone down if I,m not up to it. 

A few days R & R

I Have decided to get away for a few days for a short break and visit some friends. I Just feel some time away will help me recharge my batteries. The problem with taking time of work I find is that although I love my home, I sometimes feel the walls are closing in on me. Its ironic really because I crave the opportunity to potter around the house more making it pretty, but after a few weeks its just not as appealing. Hopefully while i,m away this week I will find some lovely shops to buy some treats.

The appointment is through for the oncologist so at least there is movement so hopefully I will be starting some sort of treatment by the end of May. Its 2 weeks now before we take the caravan to the site, decided to wait till it had quietened down after Easter on the site, apparently the weekend of the wedding is mad on the site. 


Will speak soon

Should not off gone back to work yet!

I know everyone said it was too soon to go back to work but I did and  I have now been signed off  again by the doctor. Woke up with a terrible pain in my breast and thought its either a chest infection or an infection in the scar tissue. The doc thinks its more muscular and I need rest. I do have a very physical business and this is one of our busiest times of the year apart from the 6 week holidays. I have learnt my lesson and have now decided that I will return when I,m ready and healed fully and will not be rushing things. Why could this not of happened in the winter when work slows down.

I gave in regarding colouring my hair I,m sat here as I write with the colourant developing. I just thought enough is enough and its going to be weeks before I hear anything from the oncologist. I thought the roots were bad and then the silver streaks appeared, they are not a good luck. Su has looked over the accountants and thinks there great she can't find any problems so let hope the accountant thinks the same when I drop them off next week.

So I am planning a nice quiet weekend but I really wanted a nice g & t tonight but I can't drink because of the painkillers the doc gave me. Can't complain though cos they are working really well. So have a nice weekend yourself.

What a long day I have finally done the end of year accounts that I have been promising to start for months. It was my first time as Su has always done them and I thought it was going great, but I got right to end and found a huge discrepancy. I could not figure it out and then out of nowhere it appears. Now I cant be sure but hopefully its solved. I swear I will be doing this every month from now on.

So I didn't get an appointment through today but I did get an information letter explaining the test I,m going to be having. The test itself takes 3 weeks for the results to come back and they won't be sending that off till I've even seen the oncologist. I did ring up and they did say I'm in the system and things wont be long but with Easter coming up I'm not holding my breath. The thing that's really got me is I was given the impression 2 weeks ago I was seeing the local oncologist in Aberystwyth ( I say local but its still 1 hour away). Guess what they have now moved me to Swansea again, It is an awful 3 hour drive each way. The only way i can describe it is like a horrible winding road that feels like youre going nowhere. I just don't get it because I know people get treated in Aberystwth for Breast cancer. 

Enough of the moaning  now, Easter Hols are here and there's lots to do so lets hope for some nice weather and lots of chocolate.

I have just received this china pot in the post from one of my best friends Julie, it is so pretty Thank you. I think I will put sugar in but you could put any condiment in. Lisa this is the tray you bought with the hamper, it looks great on the pouffe.

I popped in to see a client this morning who is in her 90's and still so amazingly capable of most things. She made me a lovely cup of tea in a teapot with cups and saucers and it was lovely. It,s sooo much nicer to drink out of a china cup and saucer, I shall be using my teapot more often and drinking from cup and saucers too, (I have enough of them).


My blog seems to be playing up at the moment have lost things of my sidebar has anybody else experienced this? Oh it seem to have sorted itself out, obviously gremlins in the system.

Just a few new things I have purchased for the caravan for the summer. The flask is to go with our picnic hamper because we go for lots of walks while at the caravan and its so much nicer than the big silver one we have been using.

 These are part of the Breast Cancer range so I had to buy them and they are perfect for putting herbs in.

The egg box is a vintage find which I saw and thought I have to have that. Only problem is it will only close properly with small eggs.

Today is another gorgeous day, I think another walk with the dogs on the beach is in order again. I heard some amazing news this week, "Pet shop Boys" are supporting "Take That" when I go with my girls in June. I know not a lot of people will agree with me here but I'm more excited about seeing them than Take That, I love the 80's.


  I  feel I,m ready to go back to work and Easter is one of our busiest times of the year, so its all hands on deck for 2 weeks even Darren has agreed to help a little bit ( a first in 3 years). I'm starting to bore myself because I'm not used to doing so little, even reading is boring me and yet I longed for those quiet times I could sit and read without distraction.

 We were invited to a works reunion tonight and I really didn't want to go, so Darren's decided to go alone. Which is fine except I'm really annoyed now because I do want to go but I can't, not that its too late notice its because I'm not really up to socialising all night and it will be a long night. I'm just frightened of missing something I always have done since I was a little girl. I bet there are people there I would love to have seen too. Never mind will go to the next one in 5 years. Have started adding to my other pages now I'm getting more confident, blogging is so much fun.


Oh yeh I know what else has annoyed me about tonight its "Hog Roast" and that's one of my fave things ever (sorry to anyone whose a vegetarian). 

Well Darren has finally moved everything back home and its now all packed away, most of its in his man shed so he can spend all his time in there. Its not somewhere I venture very often I only go to take him out cuppa's, so I don't care if it's a mess. I must say thanks to Luke for helping with lifting boxes and moving the caravan with him as I'm a bit useless still. 

Chris the mechanic is sorting out Polly Dolly's brakes on the drive as we speak so hopefully they wont overheat this season when we are travelling. All I can say is thank god we hadn't taken her on a long journey last year when they over heated, it burst the tyre it was so hot.

In general everything is good the scars are good and healing really well. I'm happy in general (although my roots needs doing but I,m not doing it till I know about chemo cos I,m not wasting my money if its all going to fall out anyway) and I'm looking forward to going back to work soon before my next treatment whatever and whenever it is.

So today I went to the hospital to have a a check up and make sure my lymph nodes had tested clear. I was under the impression weeks ago that they would be fine and they are, I was also told I wouldn't need chemo just radiotherapy. I,m pretty sure the nurse said words to the effect "it's a done deal" So I was hoping today I would get a vague timetable of when radiotherapy and tamoxifen would be starting, I like to be in control and organised and know whats going to be happening. 

Maybe I,m naive cos its not a done deal and I have to wait for more tests and I may have to have chemo if the oncologist thinks it going to be beneficial. So I,m still uncertain what happens next and I,m fed up. I'm not depressed just fed up and obviously I would like to know I don't need chemo. I shall now wait for my appointment with the oncologist which will hopefully be soon.  I apologise for being miserable I know I will be fine tomorrow, it dosen't take me long to bounce back.

Lollipops

  As I'm off work a little bit longer I'm finding things to do that I never get round too. Haven't baked in months but I made a cake yesterday. I'm going to sort out my wardrobe and closet today, I've been  unable to shut my wardrobe properly for some time and now Darren's brought his clothes back from his last posting its at crisis point. So maybe instead of giving my clients a spring clean I will have an opportunity to do my own for a change (but not as heavy duty).

Made some chocolate lollipops this morning for the kids especially our godchildren across the road Jacob and Izzy who love coming over to see me cos I always have a bucket full of sweets. I made some chocolate chilli ones for Darren, and if they go down well I will experiment with other flavours and coverings for Easter. I bought some really gorgeous cupcake cases and matching gift boxes to carry them in from San Francisco last month. I'm sure they do sell these in the UK but Iv'e never seen any and the Americans are a bit mad for there cupcakes so its really popular there. So that will be one of my tasks for next week, I'm thinking a nice lemon frosting or maybe strawberry.